Depressed of staying at home

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Yeah this meme up here is pretty much some of it and there are millions of others who feel the exact same way with everything shut down still in many different states. I completely understand stay at home and helping flatten the curve because I live in a red zone area and at the moment the stay at home orders are until June 4th. Which I highly doubt it will be June 4th because usually a week before it’s supposed to happen the Governor comes on the TV and social media and announces “Oh you now have to stay home for another month”.

I am mentally exhausted of staying at home and just being in one place. Yes I have some friends and mostly acquaintances but I only see these people at meetups at restaurants or at a kink club I go to occasionally. I am grateful for social media and the platforms that are available because there has been a few zoom meetings and ways to keep in touch even though it’s not direct face to face. I myself have depression, ptsd, and anxiety and yes I take medication daily to help curve all the symptoms but sometimes that’s not enough. Right now I’ve done the coloring, painting, crafting, playing video games, steam a video platform until i’m dead asleep……..pretty much I’ve been doing it all. I’ve even done a few Tik Tok videos because yes i’m bored at home with everyone else.

No I don’t take this virus as a joke because a few people I do know have had it and it’s not pretty and also this mother who was in the hospital with her Four Year old son taped what exactly goes on with covid-19 and it’s really not something you want to have. The Four year old was in tears most of the time gasping for air and coughing and all the time was on one of those respirators to help him breathe. It was so heartbreaking to watch and yes the Four year old pulled through and survived the whole ordeal. No You don’t want this and I don’t want this. I would like maybe a little bit of normalcy though besides doing things at home. Yes i’ve been on a walk around the block and well i’m a little limited in where I go and transportation as I don’t drive and also I live with my mom, whom has been a huge support, who is 70 years old and I have to be really careful where I go and everything. I also have two teenagers and I have to plan their stay at home birthdays because they’re right around the corner!

It’s just been rough with all of this and yes going through all the emotions as everyone else has gone through and continue to go through.

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